The Monkey Exhibit

Great, Green Gobs of Greasy, Grimy Gopher Guts
(Tom Glazer)

CHO: Great, green gobs of greasy, grimy, gopher guts,
Mutilated monkey meat, itty bitty birdie feet.
Great, green gobs of greasy, grimy, gopher guts,
And me without a spoon.

Some people eat hamburger meat while others like potatoes,
And some must chew their Irish stew along with ripe tomatoes.
I can’t understand why in ev’ry land, they serve such peculiar dishes.
For wherever I go, they always say “No!” when I tell them what my wish is.
I scream for … (Chorus)

I can pay my way in a French café which is big and quite expensive,
Where the diners dine and the wine is fine, but I’m always apprehensive.
When the menu comes, I twiddle my thumbs at the list of fancy dishes:
Caviar and steaks, champagne and cake, is never what my wish is.
I beg for … (Chorus)

In the life to come, I intend to hum this hymn to old Saint Peter:
I won’t need much, when my harp I touch, and become a heavenly eater.
I won’t ask for money or milk and honey, and my voice will never falter
While the trumpets blare on the Golden Stair as I stand at the Shining Altar.
I yell for … (Chorus)

(Tag:) And me without a spoon! Yuck!

copyright Tom Glazer
oct00

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CHICKEN LIPS AND LIZARD HIPS

Oh, when I was a little kid I never liked to eat,
Mama’d put things on my plate, I’d dump them on her feet,
But then one day she made this soup, I ate it all in bed,
I asked her what she put in it, and this is want she said.

Chorus:
Chicken lips and lizard hips and alligator eyes
Monkey legs and buzzard eggs and salamander thighs
Rabbit ears and camel rears and tasty toe-nail pies
Stir them all together, it’s Mama’s Soup Surprise.

I went into the bathroom and stood beside the sink,
I said I’m feeling slightly ill, I think I’d like a drink,
Mama said “I’ve just the thing, I’ll get it in a wink,
It’s full of lots of protein, and vitamins I think.”

Chorus:
Chicken lips and lizard hips and alligator eyes
Monkey legs and buzzard eggs and salamander thighs
Rabbit ears and camel rears and tasty toe-nail pies
Stir them all together, it’s Mama’s Soup Surprise.

A thank you to Miranda for brining these songs up!