A wee fairy (or some small, inconspicuous folk) has been stealing my sleep from me for a couple of weeks now. This disturbs me greatly, for I count on my sleep to get me through each successive day. Without my sleep I am like Samson without his hair; I grow weak and don’t have the energy naturally abundant in me to get me through. Needless to say, I am very close to complaining about these fairies to their superiors.
Tuesday, instead of defending myself with words, I decided to take action. Apparently the fairies had been taking my sleep and storing it in little containers in our medicine sample room in the office here where I work (a very queer place, indeed, to keep my sleep, but fairies are strange folk, always flitting about here and there and never really making any sense). With this knowledge, I enlisted the help of two warriors, experienced in battling thieving fairies (by day they are a Certified Medical Assistant and a Licensed Practical Nurse, respectively). With their astute battle tactics, we gained possession of the magical “key” that opened the room where mortal’s dreams are held.
Our strategy was direct, and were about to reunite me with my long, lost dreams, when a guardian appeared to halt our progress. It seems the fairies had enlisted the aid of an ogre to guard their treasure (I say “their treasure” albeit stolen from its rightful owners). As the ogre came rushing at us out of his cave, one of my companions cast a Charm spell in his direction. Within seconds she had the ogre initialing the paperwork necessary to return my sleep to me. We were able to exeunt in complete safety.
Today I honor my noble comrades with my sincere appreciation. My sleep and I spent a wonderful night together, just like it used to be.