Monkey…It’s What’s For Dinner

Great, Green Gobs of Greasy, Grimy Gopher Guts
(Tom Glazer)

CHO: Great, green gobs of greasy, grimy, gopher guts,
Mutilated monkey meat, itty bitty birdie feet.
Great, green gobs of greasy, grimy, gopher guts,
And me without a spoon.

Some people eat hamburger meat while others like potatoes,
And some must chew their Irish stew along with ripe tomatoes.
I can’t understand why in ev’ry land, they serve such peculiar dishes.
For wherever I go, they always say “No!” when I tell them what my wish is.
I scream for … (Chorus)

I can pay my way in a French café which is big and quite expensive,
Where the diners dine and the wine is fine, but I’m always apprehensive.
When the menu comes, I twiddle my thumbs at the list of fancy dishes:
Caviar and steaks, champagne and cake, is never what my wish is.
I beg for … (Chorus)

In the life to come, I intend to hum this hymn to old Saint Peter:
I won’t need much, when my harp I touch, and become a heavenly eater.
I won’t ask for money or milk and honey, and my voice will never falter
While the trumpets blare on the Golden Stair as I stand at the Shining Altar.
I yell for … (Chorus)

(Tag:) And me without a spoon! Yuck!

copyright Tom Glazer
oct00

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CHICKEN LIPS AND LIZARD HIPS

Oh, when I was a little kid I never liked to eat,
Mama’d put things on my plate, I’d dump them on her feet,
But then one day she made this soup, I ate it all in bed,
I asked her what she put in it, and this is want she said.

Chorus:
Chicken lips and lizard hips and alligator eyes
Monkey legs and buzzard eggs and salamander thighs
Rabbit ears and camel rears and tasty toe-nail pies
Stir them all together, it’s Mama’s Soup Surprise.

I went into the bathroom and stood beside the sink,
I said I’m feeling slightly ill, I think I’d like a drink,
Mama said “I’ve just the thing, I’ll get it in a wink,
It’s full of lots of protein, and vitamins I think.”

Chorus:
Chicken lips and lizard hips and alligator eyes
Monkey legs and buzzard eggs and salamander thighs
Rabbit ears and camel rears and tasty toe-nail pies
Stir them all together, it’s Mama’s Soup Surprise.

A thank you to Miranda for brining these songs up!

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4 Responses to Monkey…It’s What’s For Dinner

  1. Desperate Housewife says:

    My version goes like this:
    Great Green Globs of Greasy Grimy Gopher Guts, mutilated monkey meat, regurgitated birdy feet, French Fried Eye balls swimming in a pool of blood, and me with out my spoon…..but I got my straw!

    and that’s the official girl scout lyrics :mrgreen:

  2. Roger says:

    Thanks for stopping by DH (or DHW, that sounds better to me…)

    Miranda sent her own version of the lyrics to both songs, then I looked on the internet for “official” lyrics. These are what I found in my search, official or not. She, too, said they were “camp songs” so maybe she had a girl scout experience similar to yours!

  3. David B says:

    Thanks,
    I finally found it: “Chicken lip and Lizard hips”. Now I will share one with you.
    OUR SPIDER
    Last night my lit-tle spider died. He died commiting su-i-cide. Some say he died to spite us, of spider meningitus. He was a nas-ty old spi-der anyway–we ate him.
    With fond regards,

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