My mother and I are friends. She was young when she had me, too young to have a child really. When you are sixteen you should be enjoying high school…or at least trying not to make too many social blunders, depending on what type personality you have.
We went out for Mother’s Day last night and I told her how I viewed our relationship. It came up because my wife had been talking about the mother-son relationship and how different it seems to be. The only other thing I compared it to was the special father-daughter relationship. My mother-son relationship is like this: to me, it was me and mom against the world. We were the constants in each other’s lives. Her boyfriends may have come and go, been losers or OK guys, but there was always me and her. You don’t mess with my mom and you don’t mess with her child, those were the rules if you wanted to be with us.
To her, we grew up together. As I mentioned she was too young to have a child. She had some maturing to do and as I was maturing physically, she was maturing mentally. When this happens you lose some of the parent/child relationship (say after the child is weaned, potty-trained, etc). It seemed we were more cohorts than parent/child. This bred, for me, not just the love of a child for a parent, but also the bond of friendship. Family you can’t choose, friends you can. For me, the bond of friendship supercedes that of family; as I mentioned friends are by choice.
So here’s to my mom. Whether it is us against the world or us growing up together, we are not just family, but we are friends.