Dieters Beware!

You know what I really like? Popcorn!

No, not your wimpy 99% fat free or your light butter. Give me the good stuff! I want butter lovers! I want theatre/movie style butter! I want it loaded! I want to stick my hand in the microwavable bag and get it covered in butter as I scrape the sides on accident!

I’ll eat the bag one lucious kernel at a time, savoring each heavenly bite. Do angels eat popcorn? I hope so! Maybe they’ll microwave it for me and bring it to my mansion, that way I won’t have to get up from reading my book. Wouldn’t that be swell?

Last night I made cinnamon swirls. We had extra pie crust from the holidays. I flattened it out, buttered it, and sprinkled cinnamon and sugar all over it. Then I sliced the shell into thin slices and rolled them into swirls. I ate the entire shell worth of cinnamonny treats! Well, except for the one my wife ate. She’s selfish that way.

Hey, have you ever gotten a popcorn kernel stuck between your tooth and your gums a couple days before going to the dentist? Then, when the dentist was going at your teeth, he pulled out a kernal with the little scraper-thingy? That’s almost embarrassing.

I think I’ve had too many Tootsie Rolls today…

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2 Responses to Dieters Beware!

  1. Scoob says:

    What’s a diet?

  2. Roger says:

    You don’t have to beware.

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